I would say that these pictures are not special or nice pictures for that matter . But I absolutely love them and I loved when I took them ! I have been so freaking happy since that morning . White Clay with my baby <3 !

Have had an absolutely AMAZING last 2 days  SO happy ! <3

Happy ? Me ? Really ? No way Jose not possible . . . But I am . . and extremely happy for that matter. So excited !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I knew that would be the answer all along . I love you so much !

On a serious note . Call me restricted or something . I don't know . Text . Anything . That way we can have an in person convo . This is obviously getting nowhere

I need to get a grip instead of being the jealous type goddamn

This kid . . . Really trying so hard to talk to my ex gf that I love ? And she's holding MY CHILD ? Like really dude ? You must be loopy . . Really loopy . . . Like really fucking loopy

You know how to reach me so if that day ever comes you know where to find me too

It's almost like I'm waiting for a knock on my front door . Or a rock at my window . Haha , I wish

Waiting . . . But don't know if I should . I have hope but it keeps getting smaller and smaller as each night passes . GIVE ME A SIGN !!!

Bam's alone was cool . . . SIKE

My brother made a great point last night in our little talk . But no one understand how much she means to me , everyone thinks I should be mad at her and move on etc . . But I won't , I refuse , I love her too much . Anyone telling me to forget her and hate her can go F**K themselves . Including my friends . Just drop it , you'll never change the way I feel about her . Thanks

olive juice more . . .

Well I'm certainly retarded

If you love me won't you let me know - Coldplay

Some dreams stay dreams and some dreams become reality .

You're not making the right moves . The opportunity is right in front of you . I had so many signs today that freaked me the fuck out today and sure enough it's all leading up to something . . . I'm scared . I hope she makes the right decision and that's what thus is leading up to . . It's sad to see that I do not exist to her

So her baby's father is walking down the street and she acts like he doesn't exist than sits there and claims to love him ? Hmm makes a ton of sense . Especially when you figure it's only illegal for me to talk to her . Not for her to talk to me . That's love ? Embarrassing excuse . You think it's funny or something ? I don't ? It hurt me so bad to see her , just her car . And she waves to my friend and pretends I don't exist . That's sure a great way to work out your "love" for someone . Showing me a lot . . .

Well that just ruined my day .

I'll sum it up . I haven't talked to anyone besides my friends . There have been NO GIRLS AT ALL . She is all I think about as it is obvious . At the same time I'm disgusted at the fact that random ex bf's and social networking is more important than fixing the mistake she made . She's too stubborn to even realize she handled the situation wrong . She has said and is saying things that are lies and don't make sense . She says she loves me and all of this nonsense but than claims I have moved on ? When any normal person would have thrown the fuck you I'm never talking to you again , I sit here and cry and dream of being with her . She thinks I'm out doing shit or whatever , Well I'm not , nor will I ever , The only girl for me is her and if she can't accept that through her stubborn head than that is her loss . If she loves me and wants to be with me and have a family than she would fix her mistake or at least regret it because there is nothing I can possibly do in my power to fix things without getting arrested and locked up in jail . If there was something I could do to fix things without jeopardizing life behind bars and more fines than I would do it in a heartbeat . She doesn't understand that if she even loves me and ever wants this to work . The ball is in her court . She needs to do what she needs to do if she really feels the way she claims regardless of what people say or will think .  But at this point in time , I have no idea how she feels and it kills me every second of every day . I love her , and I always will . But I can't sit here and wish upon a star that will never exist . I have no power in how things go , she doesn't understand that either . She says things to the "peer community" so I guess people feel sympathetic ? I have no idea ? But things claiming I am with other girls etc . . I would NEVER and SHE FUCKING KNOWS THAT and that's what hurts the most . . . . She claims I have moved on and far beyond it and that she can't and yet she was the one that did everything to make this dream of mine impossible . How does that make any sense ? I haven't moved on . Nor will I ever . I'll be there with open arms any second of any day and she knows it . It's sad to see that she doesn't care to see that or that she doesn't want to accept the fact that even after everything she has done . I still want more than anything in the world what I always told her I wanted . Her love , Our love , a family together and a life full of happiness . I already let go what she did . Maybe she doesn't want to accept the fact that I didn't move on and that I would trade anything in the world to see her again and hold her . I'm beyond confused . . . Why would she do this to herself if she really feels the way she does ? She knows there is nothing in my power to do to fix anything . If I could I would . . But I can't and she knows it . And yet she is too damn stubborn ( if she really feels that way ) to do the right thing and make everything right . My head is going to explode

There has been no girls , someone is obviously lying to you and its a fucking shame you believe that bullshit .

All I'm saying is that if I were you , I'd be more concerned about fixing your mistake(s) than being social and social networking with a bunch of ex boyfriends and people that won't be in your life or even come close to sharing the bond that we did . It's a damn shame . But I just need to get over the fact that that's how some people are . It's just going to suck that when you decide you want me in your life etc . . . That I might be way beyond that come 18 months and many more mistakes . Whatever dude , your loss , and you can live your life without regret but I promise that's something that you will always regret and wish that you made the right decisions . . . Sucks

Go to www.theberrics.com

And watch Torey Pud's Battle Commander !

What could you possibly be complaining about . This is what you wanted . Don't act like you care about my feelings or my love for that matter . Putting effort into my skateboard from now on and not another human being . It also amazes me how much people can be hypocrites . But eh , what are ya gonna do . People will be people

On a positive note . . .Sorta

These guys went to the Phillies Vs Mets game and apparently took pictures of my skating the handrail . Really cool pictures I love them ! Thanks random people <3

Finally accepted the fact of "stay out of my life forever and never come back". You know , at first , even after the facts . I still had dreams left and hope . Well now that I finally got it through my thick skull to just get the fuck away , the reality hits hard . Harder than anyone can punch times a zillion . I'm crushed . My hearts broken in 5108968615 places and it keeps getting worse . If it helps . At least I caught the drift so you'll never have to worry about me again . And if it helps I guess you could say now I'm no longer your problem . @#FuckTwitter

I wish I was better at that stupid photobucket crap . Whatevers

Putting all of this depression into skateboarding . Hopefully this will turn out with either good footage or broken bones . God , the urge to talk to her is painful . Fuck my life .

The decision needs to be made before May 4th .... 3 Days ... In reality , I only was given one option ... When I feel what is right to do I will post it probably . Ah , I wish it was as easy as I want it to be . But this is what they wanted . .